"...like that interpreter in Private Ryan with the ammo belt..."
Catfish (left); Lodo Grdzak (right): In Denver
Catfish (front left); EP (2nd from left); Lodo Grdzak (middle); Guide (face obscured):
"There's a girl I'd definitely like to see."
The voice in last night’s dream said blog like you’ve never blogged before, which struck me as a moronic statement even then, let alone now in print. What it means to blog still unclear, though I think it meant it's time to relieve myself of these accumulated stories rather than stifle them down the way EP choked his vomit down before our trip on the Arkansas River. A bad portent for sure, yet validated entirely by his performance out on the water. Catfish and I navigating our way thru endless pushy 3’s and 4’s while EP simply cringed and heaved and stared into the bottom of the raft like that nerdy interpreter in Private Ryan who sat and cried with the ammo belt in that final battle scene. Uh,..tough time to bail on us you wanted to tell that guy and what I’d have told EP. But as we approached a lull in the river’s current EP must have sensed our mood and thus immediately interjected before we could comment, “I didn’t get any sleep last night.”
Sure, no sleep. I suppose that’s an excuse just like our guide’s being a former Army Ranger could excuse his constant use of the words gay and Jew to describe various aspects of our performance and the scenery.
"Now when your guide tells you to paddle,” he told the group while we were on the bus, “don’t just stick your paddle in the water and splash it around. That’s gay. You need to pull with your whole core (here he demonstrated the technique) all the way past your body--okay. None of that gay stuff.”
And later as we passed a huge cliff with a large protuberance our guide told us, “You see this rock here?--we call it The Jew ‘cause it looks like it has a real big nose. See it there? Looks just like a big Jew.”
Did I mention I have a huge nose reader?
Well, I guess you can’t stay in New York City forever, even if you’re mantra is to stay put and watch the world go round. As for myself, I’ve been on the road for the last month--Maine, Montauk, Colorado, Kansas. Hell, if lack of sleep made me sick I’d have puked non-stop since July. Ever since I met with my new boss in Corona towards the end of last month.
“Lodo, I can’t believe what I’m hearing. Tell me again what happened.”
At which point I provided a detailed explanation of what caused me to quit my last job. A description I’ll perhaps post at a later time, but will avoid now for brevity; and because those closest to me all agree its time to let it go.
But back in July it still felt good to get it out--each phrase capped with an exclamation point or a fist slam on the hardwood table until I was about to stand-up from my chair before my new boss descended into a giggle fit and gestured for me to sit down.
“So you just quit?!” he asked as he wiped a merry tear from his eye.
“Yep, right then and there,” I responded still breathing hard.
“Oh that’s classic! Good for you. ...So what’re you gonna do now?”
“Well there’s talk of possibly assigning me to a desk so I could work for a different supervisor. But that’s just talk for now. All the manager’s would have to agree to it and I don’t see that happening.”
My new boss looked at me skeptically.
“A desk?” he asked with eyes locked on mine.
“Yeah,” I responded with darting eyes.
“You?” he asked again, this time with just a hint of the Cheshire’s grin.
“...Yep,” I answered, “I am getting older.”
“Yeah you are,” he answered as he momentarily looked away. “...Listen Lodo, I’m not gonna beat ‘round the bush. You’ve got a job right now if you wanna work for me.”
“Really?” I asked, surprised by his abruptness. “I brought a resume with me and a few report samples if yo...”
“Please,” he said as he waved me off. “I don’t need any of that--I remember your work. Those guys at _______ are idiots to have let you go, but I can see why you wouldn’t fit into that culture. I’ve got a ton of cases right now you can handle. My clients would love you. What were you making at ______?”
“$_______.___”
“You got it. How much vacation do you need?”
“Uh..okay--wow,... __ days?”
“Done. Plus I’ll give you 6% of everything you bill out--to start, a laptop, and I’ll put you on my health insurance right away. What d’ya say?”
“Well,...whew! This is a bit of a surprise. A pleasant one for sure, but...”
“Tell you what Lodo--think about it. Get the hell out of New York for awhile. This summer’s’ been too freaking hot. I’m not going anywhere and once you get out you can gain some perspective.”
“...I suppose that sounds like a good idea. There’s a girl in Denver I’d definitely like to see.”
“So go see her. Talk it over with her. ...’Cause lets be honest Lodo,” he said as he raised his wine glass for a toast, “I don’t see you leaving the road.”
* NOTE: Due to the length of this post, I'm gonna split it into...several more parts.
4 comments:
It's good to see you back in the blogging saddle. But as I write this a small tear is running down my cheek. I see you visited Maine and we did not get together. You could have stayed at my house and we could have all got blasted and I could have given you the tour. Shame on you Lodo.
Like I said good to see you back.
I'm ex-ci-ted! Welcome back and congrats on the new gig. Dude, I have GOT to take a page from your book.
Ah Willie--I'm more than flattered by your tears. But I had some serious familial responsibilities to tend to on that short trip. When you first mentioned it back a month or so ago.... I'm gonna come back to this topic!
And Ava, yeah. Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!!!
welcome back, Lodo. Good luck with your new adventure.
That guide...I think he may be related to my in-laws.
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